I don’t know if I do. As in I am not sure. This is one topic which I am really confused about. When asked about it all I manage is an ‘Umm’, ‘maybe’ or ‘I don’t know’. I don’t pray everyday. I don’t religiously go to temples or churches.
The only time you will find me in a temple is when my mom manages to drag me along with her. The only time you will find me in a church is on Christmas, that too not because it is Christmas, but because the particular church I go to has fond memories associated with it.
Am I an Atheist? No, I don’t think so. Am I a believer? No, I don’t think so.
I don’t believe in God in stones, in temples, in churches or synagogues. For me god is a mystic power. There is certainly something above us all. This nature, the quirks, the way the world works is something which has to be created by someone. It simply cannot exist on its own. It is, for me, a very complicated concept.
I think, many people believe in God, because it gives them someone to hold accountable. God is an explanation to so many things unfathomable. God is courage. God is Hope.
My friend gave me a book called ‘Autobiography of a Yogi’ to read. Though I don’t read spiritual stuff, I agreed because she said the book answers questions like,
Why are you on this earth?
What is your purpose or role in the overall scheme of things? And so on and so forth. Believe me she could go on and on.
But I have never thought about this. I mean, what good would it do if I came to know my purpose on this planet, right?
India is famous for its sages, guru’s, swamis, yogis, rishis, sadhu’s and so on. But for me, even the concept of a Yogi or a rishi is murky. When I see the almost naked Sadhus in the Kumbh Mela(the biggest fair in India, held once in every 12 years), smoking pot and talking on mobile phones, I think I better not go there. Let it remain a mystery.
I don’t think not bathing for days, hiding yourself in the Himalayas or shunning your responsibilities to achieve a higher goal (whatever that is) can get you closer to God or whatever power you believe in. But that again is hazy, for me. It is a mystery.
That is one of the major reasons I have starting reading the book. Also because my friend said it will change your perception entirely.
This post is mainly to clarify my thoughts, to write them down as they come to my mind; it is a parameter to measure the difference in my perception if there is any, after reading the book.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this (without further confusing me please).
Anyone has a definite reason to exist on this earth???